But tonight I discovered something while I sipped. My red cup is a reflection on my life right now. Sounds crazy doesn't it? Hear me out. . .
When the red cups came out, everyone was up in arms (because we all love to complain) about how plain the cup was. This is proof we have nothing to complain about when we are mad at a plain red cup (unless it's of course an empty red Solo cup, but who wouldn't be mad about that?) In the past, Starbucks has always had beautiful winter themed cups, which most people confuse with being a Christmas cup, which is also proof that not only do we have nothing to complain about, but we are also self centered in our beliefs but THAT is for another day.
So this year I have not at all been feeling like Christmas. In fact, when I hear Christmas music, I cry. Last night at the grocery store I thought I was going to have a panic attack as music was playing loudly over my head. I have never been super crazy about Christmas, but I have at least always enjoyed the season and the excitement of being with loved ones. This year I feel depressed, empty, sad, and lifeless when it comes to Christmas. I want it to be over because I find it too painful without my four footed friend. I cry every time I think about it. Yes, I am the girl at Starbucks in the corner with tears in her eyes, thinking about a little brown dog. Yep, that's me. I have headphones in, listening to rock music to drown out the Christmas music in Starbucks.
So how does this relate to my red cup? Apparently we are both not feeling cheerful or Christmas-y. I feel like I get it now. I never had a problem with the cup to begin with, but now that I think about it, it makes sense to me. #IamTheRedCup.
I swear I'm not drunk. Not yet at least. But Christmas might be another story. . . I'll be honest, my plan is to trespass onto a state park on Christmas Day and hike until I can't take another step because I am so tired. I'm not one to try to solve my problems with alcohol. My pattern is to deal with it through exercise and some rediculous endurance event. Remember, I am signing up for a full Ironman in 2016, partly to deal with the loss of this year.
Well that was the last sip. An empty, red cup. . . Time to hit the road and get some snuggles with Haro and Bud.
Until next time. . .